Mine

     I realized something not too long ago.  Something is not truly yours until you've worked for it, cared for it, and in essence made it yours.  My boys I call mine, but in truth I'm making them mine.  They weren't mine because I gave birth to them, they weren't mine because I paid the hospital and they weren't mine because I wake up every morning and send them off to school.
     My boys are mine the same way my house or my car is mine.  Sacrificing and hard work are making them mine.  I could sit down all the time and do nothing in teaching them right from wrong, do nothing in helping with their education and leaving it to the teachers who my tax dollars are paying, or I can spend the time and energy to help them grow, learn and become the amazing men I know they can be.  I can let me house go down hill and never work on it.  It's an older house and requires more work than I sometimes want to give, but if I did that then it wouldn't really be mine.  It's the sacrifice and hard work that makes something mine or someone else. 
     They boys can't understand for their life why I want a clean house.  They can't understand why I want them to take care of their things.  This is why.  I have been telling them lately that if they don't care about it they sure are showing me well.
     Family, friend, husbands, wives - all require work.  They aren't our family until we've worked on those relationships.  These aren't my kids until I've put in the hours and effort required to make them mine over the years.  That's why marriage and adoption can work.  As in "you love those you serve," it is the same with this.  My marriage wouldn't be mine if I weren't willing to do what it takes to call it mine.  I know this is something that most people pick up along the way long before they're as old as I am.  I knew this the whole time.  Maybe I just didnt' appreciate it like I do now.  So much more is at stake than when I was younger.  I could lose so much more now if I'm not willing to keep working on things than when I was a child.  However, due to now noticing this years earlier I've missed a lot I should have worked for. 
     Here on out the priorities are stronger and more reachable.  I'm more determined than ever that I'll be worthy at the end to call my family mine and they won't need ask why.